Transcript
You feel weak, you know.
I wasn't out there pulling a trigger or getting shot
at every day like some of these guys and some of them are fine
and they're not having the issues and I am,
and so you know, what's weak about me?
What's wrong with me?
It took a bit to realize and get over that.
It probably took me going to group and talking to other guys
that had a whole bunch of combat experience and hearing them say,
I don't know how you made it through what you did, you know.
And part of that too is a bit of survivor's guilt
when you see good men, what you see as hard, good, not weak men,
these guys wouldn't be having these problems, die.
And they have family and kids and they had their life together
and going well, and you come back and you're like, I made it.
And I'm, for whatever reason, having all these issues
and I feel like I'm a dirt bag and I'm weak.
All those get muddled into the same thing
and it makes it harder to let that stuff go.