Transcript
When I would have a relationship
it was really important for me to...
have the control over it.
That if it's not working, it's...
Internally I knew lots of times
it was my fault,
but it was because I would shut down,
and put up a barrier between me
and my intimate partner.
That just was really hard,
somewhat for me,
but it must've been
excruciating for my ex-wives
because they would get to a point
where I would just shut down
and they couldn't talk to me.
Not that I would be silent
and stared off into space.
Just, I wouldn't talk.
I would talk about anything else.
I wouldn't wanna deal
with that intimate problem.
I lost two marriages due to the symptoms
and my behavior, and inability to share.
And share with anybody, including myself.
I just didn't wanna think about it,
just it was somebody else at another time
and another place,
and it didn't really matter.