My wife said, "Do this for me," and I said, "OK, I will."

After I came back, I was in a unit in the Eugene area.

They transferred me down to another unit that was down south

and went through the whole day's events and I was sitting,

I believe I was in my uniform eating dinner.

They put me up in a hotel

because I was a long distance from my house.

So I'm sitting there eating my dinner

and I found myself listening to everybody's conversation

within probably a 20-foot range.

Now, I'm in some restaurant that's really, really busy,

and I was like all I want to do is eat my meal and go home

and relax, go back to the room and relax.

And I found myself so intent on analyzing

and deciding who's a threat, who's not a threat,

where the door is, that I, this is enough.

I want to be able to move out and move through people

and be what I was before

or something similar to what I was before.

Trying to adapt from a life that's very structured

and you have lots of control over to a life

in the civilian world that doesn't have a whole lot

of structure and is kind of controlled chaos,

not even controlled chaos sometimes.

At least, that's what you tell yourself.

And so my wife said, "Do this for me,"

and I said, "OK, I will."