I went and googled [ptsd].

I actually learned what PTSD was

when I went and googled what it was.

I started looking at the symptoms of PTSD,

and every symptom, or mostly every symptom,

that it described I was doing a checklist of myself.

And I knew that that probably was it,

but I didn't want to accept it.

So I just pushed it to the side,

because nothing was wrong with me,

in my eyes.

But in my head, in my brain,

I knew something was wrong.