I was right to the point. I don't know what my next step would have been.

I was down a bad road.

If I continued down that road, I don't know

if I ever would have came back.

I was on a collision course.

I was mad, I was angry.

My relationship was about done

and that would have killed me 'cause I've been

in a long term relationship and if I,

my relationship had just spilled out, I can't tell you.

I was drinking.

My job was in jeopardy, my credentials were

in jeopardy 'cause I'm a teacher.

I mean, it was all going down into the toilet and I had

to come to terms with that.

I had to for my own reality's sake.

I was right to the point,

I don't know what my next step would have been.

I was depressed so you can imagine all those depressed,

drinking, I would have either killed myself not knowing

or killed myself purposely.

That's where I was headed.

So my therapist told me about the PTSD treatment program

in California here and we talked about it for a while.

I wasn't feeling comfortable going out of state.

I wasn't feeling comfortable leaving my relationship

but I took a chance.

And I drove out so I had a chance to turn

around while I was driving out to California from South Dakota.

And I thought about it, kept driving, thought about it,

and I was really scared but I made that move

because I had to make the move.

I had nowhere else to turn.

I was really at my ends, my ends.