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I was morally and spiritually bankrupt.

An accident took two of Michael Hardiman’s best men. Michael (US Army, 1970-1974) came home, feeling angry and alone. But he found community and peace in a group led by a VA psychologist and chaplain.

Transcript

Man is not meant to be alone

and I was extremely lonely.

I never forgave myself
for a lot of the things

that I thought
I'd done over there.

I want to share some thoughts
with somebody

about how I feel,

but I can't trust anybody,

and I don't know
anyone that will

honestly listen to me.

I am Michael Hardiman,

I served in the Vietnam War.

Well, as a child,

I grew up in a
very religious household.

I did not believe in killing.

I didn't train in infantry,

but they put a grenade launcher
in my hand

and a 45 across my chest

and told me that
I was going out on a convoy.

I seen hunger and famine.

I seen women holding their dead
children on the side of the road

It was horrible.

You kind of
get numb to everything.

You walk around
kind of mindlessly like a robot,

start losing faith,

because how could my God
allow this to happen?

I was a technician.

My specialty was demolition

and I had a crew
that I was very, very close to,

Brown and Frenchy and Dave.

One time, we got a new supply in

of blasting caps
and grenade fuzes.

On an ammunition site in Vietnam,

there are no trees,

and that sun is beaming down

and if it set off
a grenade fuze,

everything is gonna go up.

So I sent Frenchy and Brown

down there to clean it up.

The bay went up.

When I got there, man,
all I seen was pieces of bodies,

man, wasn’t nothing I could do.

It was too late.

The only thing I could do
is get angry.

When I got home, I was bitter,

I didn't like myself very much.

I can see, because I'm real good

at standing on the outside
looking at that other fella,

and I didn't like him at all.

How can he be
worthy of anything?

I was morally, spiritually, bankrupt.

I had to get to a point

where I wanted
to do something about it.

I've been hearing
about treatment

for veterans
and treatment for alcoholics,

so I wanted to know
if there was some treatment

for somebody who was insane
as much as I was.

So, we start getting into
the meat of the problem,

and that group met twice a week

for five years, but,

I had not learned how to

handle that angry person
that was inside

that lash out sometimes.

A chaplain came to me

and said, you know,
I got a group going on

with a really good counselor.

Talking about moral injury,
and they said moral injury

is that you feel morally

that you did something wrong.

So, let's take a look

at how you got that way,
how you lost

sight of your religion and
your purpose in life.

Being in the moral injury group,

I was listening to
to other Vets talk.

It freed me up to be
someone other than the person

that I was looking at.
I got to hear myself through

somebody else's story.
It’s good to have somebody there

to kind of hold your hand
and guide you through it.

I learned
that there were circumstances

and situations
that I didn't have a choice.

I know why I did them.

I can accept that,

and if I can accept that then
I can go ahead on and be Michael,

and I like being Michael.

Loneliness did go away,

and was replaced with friendship.

Friends, kindness,

hugs, love, kisses,

Man, I got the whole gambit.

Isn't that beautiful?

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