I lost a lot of friends during that time.

With my kids, I have to work so hard to stay open to them

and to stay, to let them in and to take risks with them.

And I've lost many of my friends since I've been back.

I'm trying to socialize more, but for about four years

I didn't socialize, I stayed at home, I watched TV.

I shut myself off.

I didn't go out after work, I didn't go out on weekends.

I was home all the time, and I was fine with that.

I'd never called people.

People would invite me to do things and I'd say yes,

but then when it came time, I'd cancel.

So I was really shut down, it was just me and my kids,

and I lost a lot of friends during that time.