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I just hurt someone….Am I going to go to hell?

Michael Allison (US Marine Corps, 1999-2007) talks about his struggle reconciling his actions in the military with his belief system.

Transcript

When I was over there in Iraq.

And I'm going through
different patrols

and I'm going through different
missions,

and I had to hurt someone.

But once I got back to our FOB
and I got back to my room

and I'm laying there in my bed

inside of my head,
psychologically

that is playing through my head.

And I'm just saying to myself,
I just killed someone.

I just hurt someone
and in a normal situation,

a scenario,
I probably would be in jail.

I probably...am I going to go
to hell for this?

Am I going to be

am I going to feel a way
where I'm going to be punished

for what I just did?

And when there's
no answer to things like that,

it really,
really hurts mentally.

It hurts you physically

hurts you emotionally
to the point

where you don't
even understand

where the answers
are going to come from.

When you're going through
some of these feelings

that you're replaying over
and over and over inside

of your head.

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