I had tried everything.

I used such a tremendous
amount of substances.

And I was just really hopeless.

I was on the verge of like
wondering if I should end it all.

And it was just not normal to me.

And I remember just crying
out you know one day,

walking I would, I would
walk and cry in the middle

of the night just crying.

I remember like pleading to God like,

because I had tried everything.

I tried husbands, I
tried different states,

I tried different jobs.

And I remember saying
God I really need help.

Like I tried everything else.

I'm gonna give you a try.

And please help me God, please.

And it was maybe a week
later that I found myself

in a narcotics anonymous meeting.