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I calmed down. It was like, oh man, what did I do?

Damien Holmes, US Army, US Marine Corps 1993 - 2005, talks about how he knew he had PTSD.

Transcript

Everyone out there is going

to feel the same way when I say this.

You're used to, I've been in the military for 12 years.

You're used to the systematic of things.

You're used to told to get up in the morning, go eat,

PT, all this and that.

In the beginning it's a culture shock to you

but you get used to it.

Get rank, now you're telling people what to do.

You're loving it.

You get out, you get a regular job, someone is complaining

about getting up in the morning and coming to work

for four hours or eight hours.

They can't come to work on time.

Something that's not, shouldn't be your problem

but you hear it all the time, you're around it all the time.

It is like, why can't, why can't it be like military,

dress right dress out here in the real world?

There's too much freedom, there's too much free will.

You know what I'm saying?

There's too many crybabies around.

It gets on your nerves.

It got to a point where one of my coworkers accused me

of laughing at her when I was conversating

with another coworker.

I'm already having a bad day.

I just turned and snapped on her and we both got

into a verbal altercation

to where I know how I'm going to be.

So I just said, "Forget it, I'm out of here."

I walked home and it was about 10, 15 miles home.

I walked home.

I was so mad.

Right then and there, you know, after I calmed down,

it was like, oh man, what did I do?

I'm going to lose my job 'cause I just walked out.

But I did tell one of the supervisors, "I apologize,

it was unprofessional of me.

I'm just going to go ahead and leave."

The next day, I got called back into work.

Whew. Good to go.

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